Day 25 of Give Thanks
This is a long story…sorry.
Last year around this time my best friend Peter and I had just finalized our vacation plans for the following Fall. We were to spend a week up in Michigan. We were going to explore many of the lighthouses throughout the state…mainly because of Peter’s lighthouse fetish. He’d once stated that he wanted to visit every lighthouse in North America…well, I thought that while in Michigan we could get him started on that little adventure.
Peter grew up in Ontario, Canada…in a not so loving home…well, outside of his older sister and younger brother that is. When he was about 9 or so…they moved in with their grandparents out on their farm. That’s where they all grew up. After their grandma died…Peter really felt it was his responsibility to help Granddad out as much as he could. Yup…Peter…Mr. Responsible. 
When I met Peter he was attending a local college and was wanting desperately to change his major. See, Peter longed to be a chef…and that was his passion, but his family didn’t really agree with that idea. Now, when I say his family…I’m referring to his Mom & her brothers…his uncles…who unfortunately were the ones paying for his schooling. 
However, Peter finally stood up to them all and explained what his dreams were and then informed them that he was going to follow his dream and that was going to attend culinary art school and become a chef! I was SO proud of him!! 
Well, after telling them all of that …Peter felt a bit invincible shall we say. He and I talked quite a bit about a young lady that he had admired from a far for a very long time…we will call her C. Now, Peter wanted to ask C out more than anything…but was a bit shy around women (all except for me that is). I somehow talked him into talking to her after hockey practice one night…and he FINALLY got up enough courage to ask her out….and she said YES!! I don’t think I’ve ever heard him so psyched up for anything before…well, except for a big hockey game. 
He wanted this date to be perfect…and I wanted him to have that. So, we spent a great deal of time planning out all of the details of this “dream date”…right down to the dessert he would make for her and the flowers that he’d give her. Yup…he made her dinner and took her out on a boat for an evening ride and then danced with her under the stars. (that would woo almost any women eh?)
Peter was a classic hopeless romantic…among other things. 
He and C wound up dating quite a bit and he cared for her very much. She was good for him and she made him very happy when they were together. 
Peter loved to help people…especially if it had anything to do with cooking! I wanted to do a traditional Italian dinner for Thanksgiving instead of the traditional Thanksgiving meal of turkey and such. So, I turned to Peter for some advice. We went over tons of different dishes and menus.
He planned the entire meal for me!! I was SO thrilled to have had him there to help me plan this…now all I needed was him here to help me prepare it! Well, that just wasn’t going to happen…unfortunately, because Ontario is a ways from Denver.
Peter and I talked about everything…our hopes, our dreams…our futures…our friendship…not to mention our deepest darkest secrets and fears. We were as close as any two friends could possibly be…except that he was in Canada and only thousands of miles away. Yeah…that part was a bit frustrating for both of us.
Peter decided that he would go to culinary arts school in Denver…that way he could finish school and be able to see me as well. One problem though…C was in Canada. This made his decision a very difficult one. He decided that he would ask her to come with him out here. I thought that would be a wonderful thing indeed!
On the day before Thanksgiving, Peter and I finalized ALL of our plans and arrangements for our vacation. When we had finished, he informed me that he would be leaving for a few days after Thanksgiving to go on a trip with Granddad to see his Great Uncle who wasn’t doing well healthwise. I didn’t particularly like this idea…mainly because the trip involved driving to Nova Scotia right after a large snow storm had just passed through that area.
Peter insisted that he needed to go because he didn’t feel that it was safe for Granddad to make the trip alone. Granddad was elderly and I agreed that he shouldn’t be driving all that way on his own…but I still had a bad feeling about the trip. I explained my feelings to Peter…but Peter being a very stubborn and determined man just told me not to worry and that he would use upmost caution…that he wouldn’t even speed (his joke)…and that he would be talking to me Sunday night when they returned.
Well, since there was no arguing with that man…I agreed and told him that I would talk to him when they got back home. We said our goodbyes and ended the conversation.
Thanksgiving passed and my meal went off without …well, almost without a hitch. I totally messed up the connolis…but hey, I never said that I was going to be a pastry chef…that’s why I had Peter!
Sunday came and I waited to hear from Peter….but he never contacted me. I didn’t feel right about it because Peter ALWAYS contacted me when he said he would…but, there had been bad weather up there and I figured that he had gotten delayed.
The next morning while at work I read a message that was quite disturbing to me. It said that Peter and Granddad had been in a terrible car accident late Sunday night outside of their town and that neither one of them survived. I was in complete shock! I sat there crying…shaking uncontrollably and trying to contact a now mutual friend of ours to find out if what I had read was true.
She emailed me and confirmed that yes, Peter and Granddad were indeed killed in that car crash.
See, Granddad had been under a great deal of stress lately and while driving home he had a massive coronary. He lost control of the vehicle and it went off an enbankment and slammed into an electrical pole. Peter was killed instanly. The coroner said that Peter was asleep at the time of the accident and never even knew what had occured. He also stated that Granddad most likely died from the coronary before the vehicle ever even hit the pole. 
At that moment my whole world stopped. Peter was so very important to me…he was like the other half of my brain. How was I to function without him? 
There are still times that I wonder that same question…but then I look at my children and I see Jason…and I think to myself…Peter always wanted me happy more than anything…and I am.
Then all I could think of was Peter’s siblings…especially his younger brother. Where would he go now? Who would take of him? 
I asked our mutual friend to find out information for me about what was to happen now that Peter and Granddad were gone. She did…not only that but kept me updated on everything for quite some time. She and I have since become friends and I am thankful for that as well. Peter always wanted the two of us to talk…he said that we’d get along very well. He was right…about many things.
I’m thankful that God put Peter in my life…even though it was for a short time…I would never give up any of the time that we shared. Peter was my best friend…and I miss him more than I can even express.
I still talk to his younger brother…and he passes messages onto his sister for me. I’m glad that I have contact with them…and with the mutual friend of ours that I spoke of. That helps quite a bit…but nothing will ever replace the friendship that we shared…or the bond that we had.
Peter is forever in my heart…and my life is forever changed because of him. 
If Tears Could Build A Stairway
If tears could build a stairway and memories were a lane
I would walk right up to heaven and bring you back again.
No farewell words were spoken, no time to say goodbye
You were gone before I knew it and only God knows why.
My heart still aches in sadness and secret tears still flow
What it meant to lose you, no one can ever know.
But now I know you want me to mourn for you no more
To remember all the happy times life still has much in store.
Since you’ll never be forgotten, I pledge to you today
A hallowed place within my heart is where you’ll always stay.
~ Auther Unknown
Some of you here on Xanga may remember Peter from his blogs…if not, you might want to check out his site. Peter was only 20 years old when he died. His last post is dated Nov. 19, 2001…it is of a picture…with no words. The reason for this is because the picture needed no words, for he posted it as a surprise for me. The picture is of Mackinac Island…which for those of you who have read my posts for a while now know, that is my favorite place to visit.
Today marks the one year anniversary of his death…he is loved…and he is missed by many. 
~Maria
, compassion, strength, cleverness, wit, immunity, determination, persistance
, creativity, playing taxicab, sleeplessness 
, being a referee 
, a wonderful bedside manner, and a good sense of humor 
Christmas. 
That’s where we all spend most of our time…so, we thought that the kids would enjoy having the tree and stockings, etc. down there where they can look at it all. 
Thanks for wishing us well. 
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