August 8, 2009
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Frustration…my new best friend
Even though I’ve been behaving myself post-surgery, it doesn’t mean that it’s any less frustrating for me. One would think that depending upon others is what frustrates me the most, but it’s not. I’m frustrated with my body, for one, and the fact that I’m not prepared for school to start for my kids in just a little over a week. I’m normally totally prepared for the beginning of the new school year, but this year it is not the case at all. Mostly due to my recent major surgery, but also because my three youngest are attending school in a new district this year and have conflicting start times. When I say conflicting, I mean that in the total sense of the word. Not only do these start times conflict with my work schedule, but it puts Corin, my almost 12 year old, starting school before the twins (Caleb & Jonah) who are only 10. Dora, my eldest at almost 17, isn’t even able to help me out with this as her schedule conflicts as well. We’re looking into adjusting her schedule, but that may not be the solution to the problem. I may have to ask my ex’s mom to help me out and get my boys on the bus each morning or drop them off at school. She only lives 3 miles from us, but I’d hate to imposition her by disrupting her mornings.
I’m sure that we will figure something out, even if it means changing my work schedule, but I really wan to make that my last resort. Being the in charge of operations, I work some early hours and if I’m restricted to working later, that will make my job a tad bit difficult to say the least.
The other major thing that is frustrating me regarding the start of school is that I’m not able to go out and buy the kid’s school supplies as I’m not allowed to drive yet and my body is letting me stand for that long of a period yet either. I was able to order some new items for them on-line yesterday. Caleb has had his heart set on a new Wall-E backpack & lunch tote, so I went to the on-line Disney store and found both for $17, which is pretty good price wise. I was also able to get new ones for Corin & Jonah as well, along with a couple new shirts for each of them and a new raincoat for Caleb. He has major issues with rainy weather, the texture of the rain when it hits his skin tends to make him have a meltdown so I thought that if he had a new Wall-E raincoat that it might help on rainy days. Anyway, I got all of those items for under $100, including shipping! This made me feel a bit better, but not entirely. I had Jason go get the boys some new jeans from K-Mart this morning, on sale for $10 a pair…again, not bad. I bought the boys new shoes a few weeks ago that I’d found on clearance at Wal-Mart for $13 each.
Even though I consider myself to be a pretty frugal shopper, I’m well aware of how much is spent on preparing the kids for school each year. Dora’s fees for her senior year will total out at $130, which is nothing compared to what it would be if she attended her home school instead of a alternative school. Even still, Corin’s fees were around $60 and the boys will total out around $50 each which adds up. Not to mention how much Jason will spend on his supplies for the new year.
I must say that more than anything though, I’m frustrated that my kids are not home with me. I haven’t had them home in 2 weeks now due to them coming down with chicken pox just before I went in for surgery. I’ve never been apart from them for this length of time and I’m not coping well with it. I saw Jonah yesterday for the first time in 2 weeks and it was only for just a few minutes. I’m sure that not having them home right now is allowing me to get much needed rest, but it doesn’t mean that I miss them any less. Especially knowing how badly they wish to be home with me. I supposed to get a little time with Corin & Jonah tomorrow, but not Caleb as he still has the chicken pox. I’ve had the chicken pox, in fact I had it 4 times as a child. However, since I have a weak immune system to begin with and have just had major surgery, this risk of me contracting shingles from exposure to someone with chicken pox, is much greater than most.
I just want things to be normal again and I’m running low on patience. I’m sure these feelings have absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I’m now in menopause right? Yeah…I’m sure that’s not a factor at all.
Comments (3)
Hope your healing well my friend.Yes shingles is a real pain pardon the pun.I went through them last year and its definetly not a pleasant experience.Then to find out I’m still prone to them again was a real let down.Hope you get to feeling better and it was good seeing you post.
I can only imagine how frustrating all of this is … for all of you. I’m sure the kids want nothing more than to be recovering with you by their side too. I remember being little and nothing making everything better like mom could. But, it sounds like all of you are on the comeback trail, so that’s good.
Back to school is such a busy, exciting time of year. It must be so hard to be out of commission, but aren’t you clever using the internet to do your back to school shopping! I can’t believe your kids go back so soon. And, we’re complaining because we start on September 1st this year.
I know, better than anyone, that you are person who likes to be on top of things, to be in control of the situation. But there are times in life that you have to let other people take care of you (and the things you usually do), and that time is now, and the person most qualified to do it, fortunately for you, is me.
I love you!